The One You Feed

Spring Washam - Full- The One You Feed

 

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This week we talk to Spring Washam

Spring Washam is a well-known meditation and dharma teacher based in Oakland, California. She is a founding member and core teacher at the East Bay Meditation Center located in downtown Oakland. She is the founder of Lotus Vine Journeys an organization that blends indigenous healing practices with Buddhist wisdom. In addition to being a teacher, she is also a healer, facilitator, spiritual activist, and writer. Her upcoming book entitled, A Fierce Heart: Finding Strength, Courage, and Wisdom in Any Moment, will be available in stores on November 7th, 2017. She has studied numerous meditation practices and Buddhist philosophy since 1997. She has practiced and studied under some of the most preeminent meditation masters in both the Theravada and Tibetan schools of Buddhism. She has studied indigenous healing practices and works with students individually from around the world. She has completed a six -year teacher-training program under the guidance of Jack Kornfield and is now on the teacher’s council at Spirit Rock Meditation Center in Woodacre, California. Spring is considered a pioneer in bringing mindfulness based healing practices into diverse communities and is committed to enriching the lives of disenfranchised people everywhere. She currently travels and teaches workshops, classes, and retreats worldwide.

 

In This Interview, Spring Washam and I Discuss...

  • The Wolf Parable
  • His book, A Fierce Heart: Finding Strength, Courage, and Wisdom in Any Moment
  • How she became a meditation teacher
  • How self-compassion is at the heart of Buddhist teachings
  • How being with ourselves in difficult times is an act of mercy
  • How a synonym for mindfulness is remembering
  • How we are always trying to change consciousness
  • Her controversial Peru ayahuasca retreats
  • How meditation and mindfulness was not enough to deal with her trauma
  • Her first ayahuasca ceremony
  • What ayahuasca is
  • The risks of using entheogens
  • The debate in the Buddhist community about this approach
  • Whether you need to go to the jungle for this
  • How we often need multiple approaches to healing ourselves
  • How feeling like you are innately good changes the whole path
     

 

 

Direct download: Spring_Washam_Final.mp3
Category:general -- posted at: 9:40pm EDT

Eric is interviewed on Awesome at Your Job podcast.  Lot's of the key ideas from the show are discussed here.

Direct download: Awesome_at_your_Job_Featuring_Eric_Zimmer.mp3
Category:general -- posted at: 10:06pm EDT

Akshay Nanavati- Full- The One You Feed

 

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This week we talk to Akshay Nanavati

After overcoming drug addiction, alcoholism, PTSD from fighting the war in Iraq and recovering from the brink of suicide, Akshay Nanavati has since explored the most hostile environments on the planet and built a business helping people live limitless lifestyles. Combining his life experience with years of research in science and spirituality, he wrote a book called “Fearvana: The Revolutionary Science of How to Turn Fear Into Health, Wealth and Happiness.” Of the book, The Dalai Lama said “Fearvana inspires us to look beyond our own agonizing experiences and find the positive side of our lives.”

 

In This Interview, Akshay Nanavati and I Discuss...

  • The Wolf Parable
  • His book, Fearvana: The revolutionary science of how to turn fear into health, wealth, and happiness
  • How he got the Dali Lama to write the forward for his book
  • That we don't control what first shows up in our brain
  • How if you feel fear and stress is not your fault
  • The second dart/arrow parable
  • Acting your way into right thinking literally restructures the pathways in your brain
  • The ability to develop a positive relationship to suffering
  • Committing yourself to the worthy struggle
  • Reducing life to the simplest next step
  • Dealing with fear - it's ok to be scared
  • Bringing the rational mind into fearful situations
  • The challenge response
  • Fear is a gift if you believe it to be
  • The growth mindset vs The fixed mindset
  • If you want to be great you have to believe that you are
  • How ego can be both helpful and unhelpful
  • The worthy struggle
  • Keeping things automated in your day so that you can save self-discipline or willpower for the times you need it
     
     

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Direct download: Akshay_Nanavati_2_Final_V2.mp3
Category:general -- posted at: 7:43pm EDT

Eric Barker- Full - The One You Feed

 

 

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This week we talk to Eric Barker

Eric is a thought leader in the field of success. His humorous but practical blog, Barking up the Wrong Tree, presents science-based answers and expert insight on success in life. Over 270,000 people subscribe to his weekly email update and his content is syndicated by Time, The Week, and Business Insider. He has been featured in the New York Times, the Wall Street Journal, the Financial Times, and he was a columnist for Wired. With a writing career spanning over twenty years, Eric is also a sought-after speaker and interview subject and has been invited to speak at MIT, West Point, NPR affiliates, and on morning television.

His first book, Barking Up the Wrong Tree: The Surprising Science Behind Why Everything You Know About Success Is (Mostly) Wrong is available now.

In This Interview, Eric Barker and I Discuss...

  • His book, Barking Up the Wrong Tree: The Surprising Science Behind Why Everything You Know About Success Is (Mostly) Wrong
  • How he defines success
  • Achievement, Happiness, Significance, Legacy
  • The dangers of only using one metric for happiness
  • How money is a lever to something else that makes you happy rather than the thing that makes you happy in and of itself
  • There's no finish line in the quest of what makes me feel good
  • We must decide what is "enough"
  • New and novel make our brains happy
  • We must decide what really is going to make us happy in the long run
  • Turning what we do in our lives into games can be helpful in increasing our persistence and grit
  • Games have these attributes: Winnable, Novelty, Goals, Instantaneous Feedback
  • A feeling of progress and meaningful work keeps us engaged
  • Challenging yourself in a familiar task
  • True burnout is when you start to feel pessimistic about your job so you withdraw and then you get poor feedback so you finally disengage
  • Autonomy, Mastery and Purpose
  • A change is as good as a rest
  • That we are telling ourselves stories about what's has meaning and what doesn't
  • How telling your children about their lineage will increase the likelihood they stay away from drugs, stay in school etc
  • Therapy as editing the story we're telling about our lives
  • Cognitive reappraisal
  • The role of positive self-talk
  • I can do it vs I can't take this anymore
  • If you break your arm you wouldn't say "I am broken" you'd say "My arm is broken"
  • Listening to our thoughts from a distance and asking "is this useful?" to be more mindful about what thoughts we identify with
  • We don't choose what makes us happy, we choose what's easy
  • The role of a plan
  • How anticipation is happiness
     
     

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m is a good wolf which represents things like kindness, bravery and love. The other is a bad wolf, which represents things like greed, hatred and fear.

The grandson stops and thinks about it for a second then he looks up at his grandfather and says, “Grandfather, which one wins?”

The grandfather quietly replies, the one you feed 

The Tale of Two Wolves is often attributed to the Cherokee indians but there seems to be no real proof of this. It has also been attributed to evangelical preacher Billy Graham and Irish Playwright George Bernard Shaw. It appears no one knows for sure but this does not diminish the power of the parable.

This parable goes by many names including:

The Tale of Two Wolves

The Parable of the Two Wolves

Two Wolves

Which Wolf Do You Feed

Which Wolf are You Feeding

Which Wolf Will You Feed

It also often features different animals, mainly two dogs.

Direct download: Eric_Barker_Final.mp3
Category:general -- posted at: 7:03pm EDT

Gregg Krech- Full- The One You Feed

 

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This week we talk to Gregg Krech

GREGG KRECH is an author, poet, and one of the leading authorities on Japanese Psychology in North America. His work has been featured in THE SUN magazine, Tricycle, SELF, Utne Reader, Counseling Today, Cosmopolitan and Experience Life. His books include Naikan: Gratitude, Grace, and the Japanese Art of Self-Reflection, A Natural Approach to Mental Wellness, and  The Art of Taking Action.  His newest book, Question Your Life, will be available soon.

Gregg and his wife, Linda, founded the ToDo Institute (http://www.todoinstitute.org), a non-profit center in Vermont that uses Japanese Psychology as an alternative to traditional Western approaches to psychology. Over the past 25 years, Gregg has introduced Japanese Psychology, particularly Naikan Therapy, Morita Therapy and Kaizen, to thousands of people through his workshops and online courses. His work supports a blend of the psychological, the spiritual and the practical, and helps individuals to clarify purpose, cultivate gratitude, develop compassion and engage in meaningful action. He is a member of the North American Naikan Counsel and Editor in Chief for the quarterly journal "Thirty Thousand Days: A Journal for Purposeful Living.

 

In This Interview, Gregg Krech and I Discuss...

  • The Wolf Parable
  • His book, The Art of Taking Actions: Lessons from Japanese Psychology
  • How Eastern wisdom is directed towards taking action, as well as contemplation
  • Taking your practice off your cushion
  • The misguided premise that we have to figure things out in our life before we can act
  • The power of momentum in action when small steps are taken
  • Cultivating gratitude
  • Avoidance, resignation, complaining
  • How accepting things as they are isn't necessarily passive
  • That complaining keeps us stuck in focusing on the trouble in our lives
  • The overlap between ACT and Japenese Therapy
  • Feelings and thoughts are uncontrollable by our will
  • Allowing feelings to be what they are but not letting them inhibit our ability to move forward and take action
  • Taking action based on the needs of the situation rather than just on the feelings we have
  •  How essential it is to step back from our lives and reflect and then make choices on how you need to move forward
  • How most of the time we do not feel like doing the things that need to be done
  • Exercise being an example!
  • The maxim: Lead with the body
  • How if you don't feel like something now, you're probably never really going to want to do it so get it done now
  • That the anticipation is often worse than the consummation
  • His next book that focuses on self-reflection
 

 

 

Direct download: Gregg_Krech_Final_V2.mp3
Category:general -- posted at: 11:23pm EDT

Matthew Quick - Full -The One You Feed

 

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This week we talk to Matthew Quick

Matthew Quick is the New York Times bestselling author of The Silver Linings Playbook, which was made into an Oscar-winning film; The Good Luck of Right Now; Love May Fail; The Reason You Are Alive; and four young adult novels: Sorta Like a Rock Star; Boy21; Forgive Me Leonard Peacock; and Every Exquisite Thing. His work has been translated into more than thirty languages, received a PEN/Hemingway Award Honorable Mention, was an LA Times Book Prize finalist, a New York Times Book Review Editors’ Choice, a #1 bestseller in Brazil, a Deutscher Jugendliteratur Preis 2016 (German Youth Literature Prize) nominee, and selected by Nancy Pearl as one of Summer’s Best Books for NPR. The Hollywood Reporter has named him one of Hollywood’s 25 Most Powerful Authors. All of his books have been optioned for film.

In This Interview, Matthew Quick and I Discuss...

  • The Wolf Parable
  • His new book, The Reason You're Alive
  • ICATS - what it means and why limiting it in your life is helpful to anxiety
  • How public speaking causes him to have anxiety
  • His calming practices to manage his anxiety
  • Why dismissing whole groups of people is a mistake
  • The importance and benefit of meeting people who are different than you
  • Comfort the Disturbed and Disturb the Comforted
  • Generational tendencies in worldviews
  • The damage that's done when we shame others about their thoughts
  • The relationship between anger and fear
  • How silencing people is un-American and frustrating
  • The transparency of the main character in his new book
  • Humor is experiencing the unexpected
  • Laughing and Crying give relief to tension
  • The major life changes he has made over the past 3 years and their impact
  • Believing he couldn't function without alcohol and Rxs
  • The long-term benefit of passing on some forms of short term relief
  • The power of the past to continue to live on
  • Every experience leaves an impact on you and affects the rest of your life
  • The power of focusing on process and not result
 

 

 

Direct download: Matthew_Quick_3_Final.mp3
Category:general -- posted at: 7:32pm EDT

Russ Harris- Full - The One You Feed

 

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This week we talk to Russ Harris

Russ Harris is a medical practitioner, psychotherapist, and leading expert in acceptance and commitment therapy (ACT). His books include ACT with Love, ACT Made Simple, The Confidence Gap, and The Happiness Trap, which has now been translated into twenty-two languages. He lives in Melbourne, Australia, and travels internationally to train mental health professionals in the ACT approach.

In This Interview, Russ Harris and I Discuss...

  • The Wolf Parable
  • The principle of connection in ACT
  • Practicing attention in the shower
  • The exercise of "notice 5 things"
  • How to notice the person you come home to in a new way
  • The physical practices of yoga and tai chi
  • The observing self vs the thinking self
  • The scientific study of spirituality
  • Living a spiritual life even if it's not a religious life
  • Values = desired qualities of action
  • The difference between goals and values
  • Examples of how you can live your values on your way to your goals
  • Committed Action
  • Examining your life to identify areas where your behavior is not reflecting your values
  • The basic ACT formula of "Be Present, Open Up, Do What Matters"
 

 

 

Direct download: Russ_Harris_2_Final.mp3
Category:general -- posted at: 7:57pm EDT

Russ Harris- Full - The One You Feed

Please Support The Show With a Donation

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This week we talk to Russ Harris

Russ Harris is a medical practitioner, psychotherapist, and leading expert in acceptance and commitment therapy (ACT). His books include ACT with Love, ACT Made Simple, The Confidence Gap, and The Happiness Trap, which has now been translated into twenty-two languages. He lives in Melbourne, Australia, and travels internationally to train mental health professionals in the ACT approach.

In This Interview, Russ Harris and I Discuss...

  • The Wolf Parable
  • Getting the wolves to cooperate and not battle
  • Embracing even our most difficult feelings
  • The Reality Slap and the Reality Gap
  • An overview of Acceptance and Commitment Therapy (ACT)
  • The Serenity Challenge
  • How we always have a chance to improve our situation 
  • Taking the action that is needed regardless of what we feel
  • What "psychological flexibility" is
  • Cognitive defusion techniques
  • Recognizing that are thoughts are not facts
  • Asking the question "Is this thought useful"?
  • Noticing and Naming our thoughts and feelings
  • "The Greatest Hits" approach
  • The "I'm not good enough" story"
  • "I'm having the thought that" de-fusion method
  • The artificial distinction between thoughts and emotions
  • The Struggle Switch
 
 

 

Direct download: Russ_Harris_1_Final.mp3
Category:general -- posted at: 11:43pm EDT

Justin Stenstrom - Full- The One You Feed

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This week we talk to Justin Stenstrom

Justin Stenstrom the founder of EliteManMagazine.com, the host of the Elite Man Podcast on iTunes, a best-selling author, life coach, and speaker.

He has been featured on major news websites like The Huffington Post, Maxim, The Good Men Project, Lifehack, Elite Daily, and many more.

In This Interview, Justin Stenstrom and I Discuss...

  • The Wolf Parable
  • His podcast, The Elite Man
  • Taking control of the thoughts in your head
  • Neurolinguistic Programming (NLP)
  • Hypnosis
  • How he has battled anxiety, panic attacks, and depression in his life
  • The powerful, subconscious mind vs the conscious mind
  • The role of positive affirmations and suggestions
  • Reprogramming the subconscious mind to be happier
  • What a successful hypnotic session feels like
  • How some people can be hypnotized and others cannot
  • The key learnings from his podcast
  • The guests from his podcast who stick out to him
  • The power of failure or rejection to propel people forward in their lives and/or careers
  • The supplements that he recommends for depression
  • Fish Oil with DHA and EPA
  • Omega 6 and Omega 3 ratio
  • Vitamin D
  • B complex
  • Magnesium Citrate
 
 
Direct download: Justin_Stenstrom_Final.mp3
Category:general -- posted at: 8:42pm EDT

Heather Havrilesky -Full- The One You Feed
LA Times- Michael Owen Baker

 

 

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This week we talk to Heather Havrilesky

Heather Havrilesky writes the popular advice column Ask Polly for New York Magazine’s The Cut. She is the author of the memoir Disaster Preparedness and the new advice book How to Be a Person in the World. She writes The Best Seller List column for Book Forum and has written for The New Yorker, The New York Times Magazine, The Atlantic, Esquire, The Los Angeles Times, NPR's All Things Considered, and many other publications.

In This Interview, Heather Havrilesky and I Discuss...

  • The Wolf Parable
  • Her book, How to Be a Person in the World
  • Coming to peace with your flaws
  • Finding a place within yourself where who you are is enough
  • What a beautiful life is to her
  • How she is constantly checking and rebalancing areas of her life
  • The serenity prayer
  • "Is the juice worth the squeeze?"
  • That touching the same flame can be dangerous to some people
  • Seeing your life as a series of problems instead of a patchwork of things to savor
  • That there isn't an objectively "good way to be"
  • How people are far more complex than we give them credit for
  • The question of "does it serve you" is a good one to ask yourself in relationships
  • Not knowing how to get below the surface with people
  • How she has finally learned to relax around other people
  • That people are trapped in their head
  • To not beat yourself up for falling into the same "pot holes" over and over
 
 

 

 

Direct download: Heather_Havrileskly_Final.mp3
Category:general -- posted at: 10:20pm EDT